Alec Roach

American Literature

Knepper

HR:  Spell and Grammar Check, Easy Bib

When a Person Loses Themselves

This idea of losing yourself is unique because society today places so much weight on knowing your true self. Dickinson and Gillman both speak to this issue in the poem LXIX and The Yellow Wallpaper. Every day, humans old and young struggle with the question of who they truly are. Insecurities, physical attributes, clothing, all of these cause people to question themselves whenever someone looks at them. While this may seem like a trivial thing, Dickinson and Gillman see this as a major issue behind the human psyche. By discussing the underlying issues behind the mental instability lurking in the dark recesses of our minds, Gillman and Dickinson raise the question of do we actually know ourselves and how can we protect ourselves, from ourselves.

In Dickinson’s poem, LXIX, she describes what a “wise” person should be. “The prudent carries a revolver, He bolts the door”. This is an interesting line because you would believe that locking your door is a wise move. However, how can you protect yourself from yourself? Dickenson finishes the poem saying “O’erlooking a superior spectre More near.” Humans always try to rationalize fear; it can be an asset and a hindrance to the psyche. While humans find solace in reassurance, Dickenson would argue that humans would only be fooling themselves. By rationalizing the bump in the night or the movement behind the trees, we open ourselves to the worst enemy of all, the questions of what could that have been? Should I be scared? Do I run? Scream?

All these thoughts run through your head in a matter of seconds, and you are left with more fear than you started with. Dickinson says “Far safer through an Abbey gallop, the stones achase, than, moonless, one’s own self encounter in lonesome place.” The mind, in this instance, is that “moonless, one’s own self encounter in lonesome place”. The brain is one of the most complex systems in the known world, capable of completing tasks and preforming actions that we as humans cannot even grasp. It seems logical that when a human is frightened the only thing that they can do is think about all the possibilities, the “what ifs”.

In Gillman’s story the “Yellow Wallpaper”, the main character constantly wants attention, but receives none and is left by herself practically all day. She is denied any visitation from her child, only adding to her loneliness. Her husband only sees her at night, when she is in bed and he sleeps with her. He always belittles her and tells her that everything he is doing for her is her own good. Eventually, she begins to lose all mental capabilities, finding solace, and ‘knowledge’ from the wallpaper itself until it finally convinces her to kill her husband and escape.

The mind, while complex, is fragile, it can accomplish much, but can be destroyed by something almost insignificant in comparison. For Gillman, it was the wallpaper. Left alone for days upon end, only with her writings and the lines of the paper, the main character was driven to madness, creating illusions of a woman trapped inside the wallpaper. There have been stories of people who create imaginary friends to help cope with isolation and containment. Gillman creates a similar idea with her main character. This woman trapped behind the bars, the apparition in the character’s mind, all shows the deterioration of the character.

The question then becomes “how can you stop this?” The answer is that you cannot stop this process from happening. Left alone, Gillman’s character becomes almost insane, feral, instinctual. Humans need interaction with other humans, not just for social evolvement, but for mental health as well. Left alone, the woman slides almost directly into insanity, becoming the human form of the woman trapped behind the wallpaper. Alone, humans are weak when compared to a group of humans. Here at VMI, they instill this notion from day one. The process of the ratline is used to counteract this notion of “one above all”. You are taught to rely on your “brother rats”. Had Gillman’s character had a companion, her husband, a friend, someone else, she might not have slipped into this mental state. One possible solution to protect one’s self from themselves is to have someone else. The idea of having someone there to help combat ourselves is one strategy people employ without even realizing it. The American Psychological Association characterizes depression as “people who experience feelings of worthlessness”. Depression can easily set in, as it did in The Yellow Wallpaper. The best way to treat depression is to surround yourself with happy people, to surround yourself with friends. There have been points in my life where the only way to combat my own thoughts was to rely on my friends and family, to find support outside my own mind.

One does not always have control over their outcome especially in times of great stress of depression. The Mayo Clinic defines stress as “a normal psychological and physical reaction to the ever-increasing demands of life”. No one can protect themselves from their own thoughts. In the dark, when you are alone, that is when they come; they creep up on you, catch you by surprise, and overtake you like a freight train. Stress is one of the leading causes for the deterioration of one’s mental state, pushing high demands onto the brain and slowly wearing down the person’s core psyche. As humans, we cannot possibly defend against ourselves without methods or others to help us in our fight.

My father is a marriage counselor, but does not just deal with marriages. He deals with people that need general counseling, many cases being due to stress. My father says “Stressors cause strain, and the strain is the wear and tear on people. Most people who come into my office are looking for relief from that stress and strain. The relief comes in the form of one of two things or a combination of both: the reality, or their expectations of the reality are unrealistic. Relief comes in the form of changing one, the other, or both. It is really helping people to figure out the true cause and thus the solution to the problem.”  Something as simple as seeing a counselor is a way to help protect ourselves from ourselves. Everybody can gain something from looking at things from a different perspective.

The imagination is one of the greatest mysteries that involves the human mind. Dictionary.com defines the imagination as “a conception or mental creation, often baseless or fanciful”. Some people have wild imaginations while others have almost no imagination. Dickinson says “the brain has corridors surpassing material place”. The imagination is that exact corridor. People can come to wildly outlandish conclusions without even realizing what they are doing. Gillman even uses the imagination in The Yellow Wallpaper with the woman looking at the wallpaper and seeing a woman behind prison bars. No one can control their imagination no matter how hard they may try. The imagination has been compared to a wild animal, uncontrollable and untamable. The imagination can only be stopped by others, with reasoning and logic, by getting a hold on reality and realizing the truth in the world.

There is no one real way to protect yourself from yourself. You can only rely on others, trust in reality and try and look on the positive side of life. Gillman and Dickinson show us the true human nature, the frightening truth that we are our own worst enemy. While we may never be able to protect ourselves from ourselves alone, we can rely on others to protect us.

 

 

 

 

Works Cited

Gilman, Charlotte Perkins. “The Yellow Wallpaper” and Other Stories. Mineola, NY: Dover Publications, 1997. Print.

Dickinson

Brett Regan Roach

“Depression.” Http://www.apa.org. N.p., n.d. Web. 01 Apr. 2015.

Dictionary.com. Dictionary.com, n.d. Web. 01 Apr. 2015.

“Stress Basics.” Mayo Clinic . Org. N.p., n.d. Web.