So once again I sit before a computer screen with four artifacts open in another tab for which I can go look at and take shit out of and put in here. Luciano Pavarotti is belting it out in the background and everything else in this world his hunky dory. (Yes people still say that) For this Essay I’ll be focusing on Artifacts, 1, 2 (the mislabeled one that was really supposed to be 2B), 3, and 10. An honorable mention goes out to Artifact 7, which was my Irish Potato Famine Artifact. It would have been included, except that one was simply too easy to write, (Sorry 7, but you are always in my heart Ireland. Up the RA.) and I want to talk about things I had to either learn about or learn from, or growing my main themed idea.

            Artifact 1: Death by Idiocracy, was by far my most serious and professional Artifact within this series. The bluntness and style though was still lose, yet held its own. The humor wasn’t totally vile or slapping you in the face. My bringing in of the church and society/people as a bunch of idiots would become almost my catch-phrase throughout the rest of these Artifacts. Though not as long as my Artifacts from Biology of Gender, I tried focusing these Artifacts on getting the message across. This pattern was the style I would try and emulate in some degree with my other Artifacts. Although each is its own unique entity, none of them would have occurred quite as well stylized and thought out, (or lack thereof) without 1.

            Artifact 2: The Mystery of the Mislabeled Artifact, is actually supposed to be 2B, but because of some errors within my computer system, it was run as is. No problem, I ran with it. After spring boarding off 1, I upped the ante and through more style at the Artifact. It still gets the message across, though I tell yeah you need to be reading it fast because it goes through quicker than shit through a goose. You can tell I was working in my style more on this one, along with throwing in my own ideas near the end. What is unique about this Artifact is that it is one of very few that I did not put a video or music to. I left it as is. Pairing videos with Artifacts would become a real problem down the road, but what is unique is seeing then how powerful the words were, and the whimsical style seems to knock people down at how quick the information is presented and processed. It was fun to write as most of these were. My other point that shines through for the rest of these papers is fuck society. Pretty good message when you think about it. Or is it just me?

            Artifact 3: WE THE PEOPLE, just like the genital cutting Artifact, this is one of my most violent Artifacts. You know it’s bad when there is a disclaimer telling how bad it is, but not as bad as something else. Like the author trying to measure violence. Haha. It was brutally honest, and meant not to scare, but to show we need to be doing something. Basically take people are idiots, and fuck society, and you have the two phrases to describe this Artifact. While harsh, I believe it is effective since most people do rely on governments. Although hard to swallow for some, this Artifact was me actually in a very relaxed state of mind. Jokes can be seen and play a bit of a role within the paper, as I always try and make things light-hearted. Was the George Carlin or music, or nuclear explosions necessary? No. Do I care? No.

            Artifact 10: The Last Hurrah. Most controversial and hardest to write about. I know I skipped most of the rest, because for a little time I seemed to be unsure and confused, or tried to bog Artifacts down with music, shows, and other crap. This one was gold. I kept everything funny in the vids, because I went to town on the documentary. Everyone had a fault and I pointed it out. Society and Stupidity really no shit ran this thing for as long as it did with no cure, because FUCK SOCIETY AND PEOPLE ARE IDIOTS. Stating more facts than most Artifacts, I felt this accurately got the point across in a very serious manner, whilst still having a bit of fun. This was my return and representing of Artifact 1 in its exact opposite. A-Z This paper did take a while, but once it really got rolling it simply kept me going. I had to cut it to keep the anger or political games out of it. I guess in the end people care more about trash talking anyone but themselves, so let’s put it this way. Screw all of you.

            So this is the end. I mean the real end. (I actually get to go home after I turn this sucker in.) This second session did seem to fly by, and the lessons learned are ridiculous. Simply knowing what past disease where and where they came from, R 0, to even the social factors to disease occurrence/control or lack thereof. Learning about the CDC and WHO (not the band) really further advanced my knowledge base on the subject. Even if I don’t want to go into this field, it never helps to learn new things. (Might just save your life!) My trends for my Artifacts tended to be a bit…sporadic at best, with most points being People are idiots and let them all die, and fuck society. Although it comes off this way, make no mistake, I understand greatly the lack of time and ability to adapt it takes to handle a new disease. We will always be ignorant, because it’s NEW. Hindsight is 20/20. I can rant and rave about what to do all day, but the fact is my decision process is based off of what I know would happen. These people in these situations didn’t. The future seemed bleak, but they made it. We’re still here on this spinning rock that’s third away from the sun. (Though with this damned heat it’s hard to believe it. So yeah, who cares? It’s time we move on. The point of this class isn’t to scare, or guilt trip us into doing something about the world we live in. It’s to prepare us. Look for signs, stay informed, plan and prepare, take precautions, and always have a bug out plan.

Dr. Hinks,

Thank you for the ten weeks of non-stop laughs and cringe worthy moments. (The vasectomy video….god. it’s been great, and the knowledge I’ve learned is almost insurmountable. Thank you for your help and support through all of this and my advice for the rest of my VMI career. Thank you also for showing me that just because someone is an academic, doesn’t mean they can’t have fun, and can also still be human. Thank you for everything.

Robert