Help Received:

Thesaurus, Dictionary,

Meeting with Major Garriott, Peer Review,

General Research, Writing Center

___Maxwell Redmond Gallahan___

Maxwell Gallahan

Major Garriott

ERH-101-03

12 December 2016

Reflection of My Literacy Development

ERH-101 has been a class that has made a major impact on me as a writer. Ever since I have stared my academic writing career, which would have probably been 6th grade or middle school, I have struggled with formulating a solid argument. I had always had either a point that was to general or a point that was a fact rather than an opinion. But Major Garriott’s ERH-101 class has helped me to understand writing structure better through the revision process, which has helped me to develop the skill of formulating a thesis statement that is an arguable claim while at the same time having some merit and accuracy to it. This ability will help me perform better on my academic writing, but also set me up to be an effective Marine and Lobbyist in the near future.

For Project 1, the key to my success in the revision process, which made my grade go from a “C” to an “A,” was the amount of time I had to fix my mistakes and that time allowed me to think in depth about specific parts of my essay rather than focusing on the entire essay. In this project, my beginning thesis was, “…history is how the past and the present are linked together and if you can understand that link between the two, then it will be easier to understand the human condition.” This quote to me shows how far I have come. This thesis statement is very vague. It doesn’t make a specific argument about the article or website that I was analyzing. So the first problem with it is that I didn’t set myself up for writing strong, focused paragraphs in the body of my essay. That then led me to not answering the question that I was told to answer by Major Garriott, that question being; What is the purpose of the text? But after getting the chance to revise, I was able to produce a solid thesis; “Essentially, the purpose of history is to gain a better understanding of the environment surroundings you and how it all works in order to understand the consequences of different decisions in life.” (Gallahan, “Study the Past to understand the Present,” 1) This thesis statement provides a clear arguable claim while at the same time, specific to the article and website I choose to analyze. The thesis also answers the thesis questions, which were how does the text applied to one or more discourse communities, how it applies to the main discourse as a whole, and what the purpose of the discourse is. The way I was able to develop a solid thesis on this assignment, which led to a solid paper, was by getting multiple eyes on to look over my paper to give me advice on how to it fix up. I got three different eyes, Major Garriott, Mrs. Parson and Cadet Ayers, to look over my work during that process. I was able to assemble the points of view of those 3 people and use what I thought were the best ideas and execute them in my paper, which in the end resulted in a solid essay in addition to ideas that carried over to my next projects.

The difference from my first project and my third is that I addressed the areas I struggled with on my first project, and then used the tips I learned from my peer reviewers, to come up with the best first draft I had all year. In project 3, which is the latest project I have completed, the advice I utilized, which I got from my peer editors, was to simply focus on the details of the rubric and if I have writers block on a thesis or my thesis isn’t very effective, then write or outline the body paragraphs of my essay first, then I can summarize the body of the essay as my thesis. My thesis from project 3 was as follows; “…I had an English teacher who changed my view of writing and made my mind wonder to places I have never really been before, which opened my mind to new points of view and in the end made me come out of my shell to become appreciative of articulate and well-spoken individuals, and aspired to be like them.” (“Enlightenment,” 1) In this thesis I was considerably more clear and thorough with my argument. I clearly answered the thesis question, “How have your literacy journey and literacy sponsors shaped you as a consumer and producer of knowledge today?” (Garriott, “Analysis 4: Literacy”, 1) I answered this question through mentioning my high school teacher and stating how my high school journey has changed the way I think about writing today. In addition to focusing on the rubric and answering the thesis question considerably better, I was stuck at first on how I was going to write this paper. But then I decided to use the advice I was given on project 1 and make an outline, which organized the thoughts in my head better and made it easier to narrow down what my thesis was going to be. After I utilized these skills on my project 3 assignment, I met with Major Garriott who had very few things that she felt like I needed to correct and told me it was a “very strong start.” I think this shows how far I have come as a writer from my first project. I didn’t just disregard what I was told on project 1, but I learned from it and took those lessons with me, which resulted in me creating one of my best thesis’ yet, on project 3.

Making a clear and precise claim is an essential attribute in my future career aspirations, which are to become a Marine Corps Infantry Officer and either stay in for life or get out and become a lobbyist in Washington, D.C. The main key in both of these jobs that relates to ERH-101 is communication with all sorts of people, or creating a thesis. When conversing with people, like Democrats, Republicans, superiors, inferiors, people who are likable or people who aren’t, is part of the job description for both career paths. But me being able to talk to people about an opinions of mine and conveying it in a way that people will understand me is essential. To me, conveying an opinion to someone is simply projecting a thesis of thoughts verbally. This is essential for being an influential Marine or Lobbyist because, in order for me to reach the goal of each of these discourses, persuading different people to follow me and believe what I am saying is a must. So me developing into someone who can create a strong, clear thesis is essential not only for me now, in my academic life, but also to increase my chances of being an effective and impactful Marine Corps Officer as well as a Lobbyist.

My ERH-101 class has specific implications that have the ability to impact my life in some serious ways, in addition to the lives of others. Being about to developing a solid thesis now will give me time to master it by the time I get to the fleet or to the streets of D.C. I am going to keep focusing on the revision process to improve my writing, because that is the place where I have gained the best understanding of writing structure. In addition to the focusing on the revision process, I will continue to pick the brains of my teachers continuously to discover new ways of looking at certain writings or find different approaches for different types of writing.

Works Cited

Gallahan, Maxwell. “Study the Past to understand the Present.” Essay, Virginia Military Institution. 2016.

Gallahan, Maxwell. “Enlightenment.” Essay, Virginia Military Institution. 2016.

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